okay so i love animals. i do. but insects are a no no. like i will scream my lungs out if a moth gets in my house – oh wait! i did. it’s still in here somewhere and i don’t like it at all. moths are evil – they attack light, they eat clothes, oh and they’re annoying creatures in general because they’re EVERYWHERE! here’s an idea – my list of reasons why they are evil:

  1.  they’re everywhere
  2. they attack any source of light – a bright future is fair game too
  3. they come in a variety of sizes – the bigger they are the more damage they can cause
  4. they eat your money aka food and clothes – thus causing public indecency once they finish your fave skinny jeans and t-shirt and undies, etc… nudity is not for everyone.
  5. if you open your mouth they can fly in and choke you to death

now call me paranoid or over dramatic if you want to but i don’t do bugs.

  • moths (heck no)
  • flies (negativo)
  • mosquitoes (um heeeeccckkk no)
  • crickets (no way)
  • gnats (*cringes and gags)
  • slugs (BRING OUT THE SALT)
  • ants (BLOWTORCH AND AMMONIA)
  • grasshoppers (no)

and then the serious NOPE squad:

  • bees (running for my life)
  • wasps (uh uh no ma’am no collard greens and ham no lemonade no chicken wings)
  • yellow jackets (black and yellow hello dead fellow)
  • hornets (nuh uh no thank you)

so yeah the only tolerable insect for me is a butterfly and i just look at those, everything else can leave, bye, adios, chao.

i hope you understand my extreme dislike and intolerance of six legged creatures.

signed,

the blogger who is now barricaded in her mom’s room until there’s physical proof of the flying lint ball’s demise.

P.S. food donations via window will be greatly appreciated.

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